Please Note:  I received an advance copy of this audiobook from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

From the co-creators and co-hosts of the Peabody- and Pulitzer-nominated podcast comes this unflinching, illuminating view of prison life, as told by presently and formerly incarcerated people.

The United States locks up more people per capita than any other nation in the world--600,000 each year and 2.3 million in total. The acclaimed podcast Ear Hustle, named after the prison term for eavesdropping, gives voice to that ever-growing prison population.

Co-created for the Radiotopia podcast network from PRX by visual artist Nigel Poor and inmate Earlonne Woods, who was serving thirty-one years to life before his sentence was commuted in 2018, Ear Hustle was launched in the basement media lab of California's San Quentin State Prison. As the first podcast created and produced entirely within prison, it has since been globally lauded for the rare access and perspective it contributes to the conversation about incarceration.

Now, in their first book, Poor and Woods present unheard stories that delve deeper into the experiences of incarceration and share their personal paths to San Quentin as well as how they came to be co-creators. This unprecedented narrative, enhanced by forty original black-and-white illustrations, reveals the spectrum of humanity of those in prison and navigating post-incarceration. Bringing to the page the same insight, balance, and charismatic rapport that has distinguished their podcast, Poor and Woods illuminate the full--and often surprising--realities of prison life. With characteristic candor and humor, their portrayals include unexpected moments of self-discovery, unlikely alliances, and many ingenious work-arounds. One personal narrative at a time, framed by Poor's and Wood's distinct perspectives, This Is Ear Hustle tells the real lived experience of the criminal justice system.

Review:

I have listened to the podcast of Ear Hustle (prison slang for gossip) for several years, and really appreciate what the podcast is trying to accomplish.  The podcast is made inside San Quentin State Prison, in the San Francisco Bay Area.  With raw language and topics ranging from food and music, to lockdowns to prison sex, this is an authentic portrayal of prison life.  It is it challenging to listen to at times, but it certainly opened my eyes as to the very human lives of those paying for their misdeeds.

This is Ear Hustle is the story of how the podcast came into existence.  It chronicles the lives of the two main creators of the podcast, artist Nigel Poor, and now former inmate Earlonne Woods.  I liked this book because of the honestly of the creators.  These are not saints, and they work hard to make sure that this is not a story filled with complaints or asking for pity.  They are just showing us on the outside how prison affects not only the offender, but their families as well.  But be warned:  there is a lot of raw, explicit language and descriptions of violence in this book.  If you have been a victim of a violent crime, I would think this might be a trigger, and you should not read  it.  But for others, I highly recommend this book.  

What I Liked:

Audiobook Narrators:

I really think if you want to read this book you should listen to it as an audiobook.  This book is narrated by the two hosts of the Ear Hustle podcast.  Nigel Poor and Earlonne Woods have a wonderful rapport that I think would be tough to understand by just reading the words off the page.  Trusting others in prison is hard  and their easy banter masks years of work learning about each other, and understanding each other's motives. It's a really fascinating working relationship.

Impact of Prison on Families:

Regardless of how one feels about people in prison, one has to feel compassion towards the family members of the incarcerated.  While the children, partners, and parents of prisoners did nothing wrong, they are still paying the price of the prisoners poor life choices.  There's a lot of anger, guilt, and sadness playing out in these family dramas.  I was riveted by the stories of visiting loved ones in prison.  It's not a simple process, and families have to jump through a lot of hoops in order to spend any time with their people in prison.  It's especially hard on children.  I really felt for the mothers who have to bring their kids to a prison in order to see their fathers. 

Humanity of Prisoners:

Generally speaking, the hosts of the podcasts do not share how their interviewees got to prison.  While their goal is not to gloss over the crimes that were committed, they feel that divulging that information would cloud the interview.  I agree.  The podcast and book simply show what prison life is like.  It's up to the reader to identify with the prisoners humanity, or not.  I would say that prisoners do pay a heavy price for their crimes.  Loss of any control on their lives, restrictions on how they spend their day, and limited access to their families are just a few of the ways the prisoners lives have changed.  But prison can also bring order to the chaotic lives of the prisoners, which some find helpful so they can reevaluate their life choices.  

What I Was Mixed About:

While I liked the book very much, I felt like something was missing from the topics in the book.  There is only one section on the impact of crime victims.  Yes, I know that this book is focused on the prisoners.  But I would have appreciated some acknowledgment of how their crimes have impacted the victims of their criminal activity.  I know this is not the goal of the book, and that is why it was mostly left out.  But, if I am being honest with myself, it would have made it easier for me to connect with the prisoners if I knew they understood and had remorse for how they hurt their victims.  

Rating:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release Date:  October 19th, 2021

Authors:  Nigel Poor & Earlonne Woods

Audio Publisher:  Random House Audio

Audio Length:  10 Hours, 18 Minutes

Narrators:  Nigel Poor, Earlonne Woods,  & Lt. Sam Robinson

Print Publisher:  Crown Publishing Group

Book Length:  304 Pages

Genre:  Non-Fiction

Recommendation:  This is a hard-hitting account of life in prison and gives valuable insights into the challenges that inmates face.  I highly recommend this book.

Please Note:  I received an advance copy of this novel from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

Earth, 2050. Pregnant, unemployed, and living back home with her father, climate scientist Quinn Buyers wonders how she got to this point in her life. Her famous scientist mother is mysteriously missing, the planet is at risk from a massive solar storm, the Transhumans want to take a colony to Titan, and her assisted living companion, a robotic meerkat, is showing clear signs of anxiety and depression. But her biggest challenge is her partner. How can she reconcile her long-distance relationship with this reserved, enigmatic cyborg?

The sequel to Sarah Lahey's debut novel and the second book in the Heartless Series, Nostalgia is Heartless delves into the world of the near future, exploring a society on the brink of climate catastrophe. This time, Quinn's adventures take her across the globe to Antarctica . . . where it rains all day, every day. Readers will delight in following Quinn's journey as she races to save her family, her planet, and — hopefully — her love life.

Review:

I was fortunate enough to read the first book in this series, Gravity is Heartless, last year.  I highly recommend that you read that book first.  Nostalgia is Heartless starts out several months after the first book ends.  Set about thirty years in the future, the world is in disarray.   The polar ice caps have mostly melted.  As a result, the atmosphere has changed, and there are food shortages, wars and environmental refugees.  In other words, the world is in chaos.

And the characters are also in chaos.  Quinn is facing lots of change.  Pregnant by a man she barely knows, she is suddenly unemployed and living with her father, a survivalist who Quinn finds to be super annoying.  Mori the AI meerkat is having an existential crisis.  Tig, the transhuman who impregnated Quinn, is hiding a big secret, and Quinn's mother is still missing.  Oh, and several Terminator-types are trying to kidnap Quinn and the meerkat.  

This book was so much fun to read.  The characters are written with much humor and humanity.  And the adventure and excitement kept me reading well beyond bedtime!  I highly recommend this book.

What I Liked:

Setting:

Although this is a science fiction novel, the setting shows a very realistic scenario for what Earth would look like if climate change remains unchecked.  The Earth is getting hotter and hotter.  The wealth inequities are stark.  There are cities for the wealthy where people live in climate-controlled comfort.  And other places where people are scraping by.  Food sources have changed.  Instead of eating potato chips, Quinn nibbles on dried insects, and other food grown in labs.  Humans have adapted by integrating technology into their bodies.  When they have more tech in them then flesh, they are known as transhumans.  It's a really stark picture of our future.

Characters:

Quinn is now heavily pregnant with Tig's baby.  And while the baby is well on its way, their relationship is still sputtering.  They barely know each other.  It doesn't help that Tig is so mysterious.  He is a transhuman who is hiding some significant secrets. And, strangely, he seems to know a lot of small things about Quinn (like what her favorite meal is) even though they are still new to the relationship...

I loved Matt, Quinn's hippy dad.  He is a former musician who has amassed a fortune over his career.  And what did he do with his money? He used it to build a glass house in a forest, complete with a doomsday bunker.  He has been prepping for Armageddon, which comes in handy when a bunch of transhumans decide to go after Quinn.

There are also some amazing side characters with a sister and brother named Anvil and Stratus.  They have certain abilities which come in handy in the story.  But they are also just wonderful people.  Anvil tries to look after her little brother, but he keeps getting kidnapped!  Stratus seems to have a very special blood type that others want to harvest.  But he still maintains a sense of wonder with all the gadgets he can find.  And Anvil has the ability to harness electricity and zap people.  But both of them are exhausted from the struggle of survival.  Quinn finds them and takes them under her wing (a little maternal practice, perhaps?).

Story:

As Quinn's due date nears, she has to cut back on how active she wants to be.  She is used to being independent, and it's hard for her to acknowledge that she might need help to stay safe.  Her need to be self-sufficient is put to the test when several transhumans affiliated with a shadowy organization try to abduct Quinn and Mori the meerkat.  What follows is a rollicking adventure as Quinn, Matt, and her friends have to navigate an underground labyrinth to get to a secure bunker.  This takes a large portion of the book.  But I loved it

Even when this part of the book is over, there are more adventures to come.  Tig and Quinn start to unravel the mystery of the Shun Mantra organization.  And Quinn is still looking for her mom.  Could she have time-travelled?  

Sarah Lahey has created a dystopian world that still has people with an intense desire to affect positive change.  This hope in the future is what makes this series so compelling.  There will be a final book in the series.  And I can't wait! 

Rating:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release Date:  October 26th, 2021

Author:  Sarah Lahey

Publisher:  She Writes Press

Genre:  Science Fiction

Page Length:  314 pages

Source:  Publisher

Format:  E-book

Recommendation:  With a Science Fiction backdrop, this book is all about relationships.  It's fun, and full of adventure!  I loved it.

 I have tried to lighten my load on ARC's lately so I can focus on actually reading the many many books I already own, but never have time to read.  And, since it's October, I've picked up some wonderful books that fit the Halloween theme.  Here's my recommendation for three such books.  I hope you find them as entertaining as I did.

This novel was released in 2013 by the master storyteller, Holly Black.  It's set in a world where vampires are real, and people who have been "infected" are quarantined in "Coldtowns", so they won't infect others.  People have bars on their windows and the threat of being bitten is ever-present.  There's plenty of blood and creepy imagery to keep this scary story moving right along.  

This sweet homage to all thing Autumn is a lovely graphic novel by Rainbow Rowell.  I love all the nostalgia as the two main characters have one last night working at the local pumpkin patch.  You're going to want to runout and eat all the delicious Autumn treats lovingly described in this book.. There's also a sweet love story, and plenty of humor in this book.

I just finished this book that came out in 2020 about a trans boy who wants to prove to his Latinx family that he is deserving of being accepted for who he is, despite his family's traditional views.  This is, at turns, beautiful and heartbreaking.  Yadriel comes from a family of magical people who are separated into strict gender roles.  Girls are Brujas who use their powers to heal, while boys are  Brujos who patrol the cemetery and help spirits pass into the afterlife.  But where does Yadriel fit it?  As a trans boy, he knows he is a Brujo, but he desperately wants his family to accept this as well.  This is a book filled with Latinx traditions, food, and language.  There is also a wonderful romance that blossoms between two of the main characters.

Have you read any of these books?  Have any other recommendations?  Let me know in the comments.

Please Note:  I received an advance copy of this novel from NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (From Goodreads):

The Pulitzer Prize-winning, #1 New York Times bestselling author traces the enduring bond between a divorced couple in a poignant novel about love, loss, and the family secrets that can erupt and bewilder us at any point in life.

Through her careful words and reverberating silences (The New York Times), Elizabeth Strout has long captured readers' hearts with her spare, exquisite insights on family, relationships, and loss. And never has her perfect attunement to the human condition (Hilary Mantel) been so evident as in these pages, as Strout's iconic heroine Lucy Barton, of My Name Is Lucy Barton, recounts her complex, tender relationship with William, her first husband--and longtime, on-again-off-again friend and confidant. Recalling their college years, through the birth of their daughters, the painful dissolution of their marriage, and the lives they built with other people, Strout weaves a portrait, stunning in its subtlety, of a decades-long partnership.

A masterful exploration of human empathy, Oh William! captures the joy and pain of watching children grow up and start families of their own; of discovering family secrets, late in life, that rearrange everything we think we know about those closest to us; and the way people live and love, despite the variety of obstacles we face in doing so. And at the heart of this story is the unforgettable, indomitable voice of Lucy Barton, who once again offers a profound, lasting reflection on the very nature of existence. This is the way of life, Lucy says. The many things we do not know until it is too late.

Review:

Oh William!, the new novel by author Elizabeth Strout, is the culmination of a three novel exploration of the affects of child abuse.  As with the other two books, these topics are brought up subtly.  There's as much conveyed with what's not being said as there is written on the page.  I enjoyed this series of books so much for it's characters, storytelling, and insights.  Oh William! is a worthy conclusion to this series.

What I Liked:

Progression of the Series:

This is the third novel in the series where the author explores the effects of childhood trauma.  The first book, My Name is Lucy Barton, shows how Lucy glossed over the many terrible things her parents did to her and her siblings.  We see how Lucy's mother simultaneously attempts to make amends while also minimizing what happened (a classic gaslighting technique!).    The second book, Anything is Possible, is a series of short stories about many of the peripheral characters from Lucy's small town.  We see that everyone has various hidden traumas and secrets.  And it shows, in particular, how Lucy's siblings were affected by their child abuse.  The third novel, Oh, William, demonstrates how what happens in childhood lingers for most of our lives.  All of Lucy's relationships are affected by her difficult youth.  

Characters:

We are reintroduce to Lucy, her two daughters, William, Lucy's ex-husband, and William's mother.  Lucy and William are not well into old-age, and her daughters are in their thirties.  

Lucy has just lost her husband of many years, David.  She still doesn't really blame her parents for her horrific childhood.  I think she puts most of the blame squarely on their poverty.  I do think that, as an adult, one can see the contributing factors (such as stress over money, and earlier trauma) that boil over into child-abuse.  It's not that Lucy gives her parents a pass on what happened.  It's that she doesn't hold any anger over them.

I liked how we get to see Lucy and William's daughters, Becka and Chrissy as adults.  They are barely mentioned in the first two books.  But here we see how the their parent's lives have an effect on them.  Although Lucy has attempted to shelter her daughters from the worst of her ex's affairs, the girls have always sensed that infidelity was the cause of their parents divorce.  For the most part, Becka and Chrissy are doing well.  But I could also see that they lost a lot of respect for William as he goes through yet another divorce.  How will this affect their own marriages?

William has had a series of failed relationships following his divorce from Lucy.  He makes a lot of excuses for his behavior.  But he doesn't acknowledge how his relationship with his mother may be at the root of his issues.  Catherine, William's mother has been dead several years in the timeline of this novel.  And William is just now facing the fact that Catherine (his mother) was not so perfect, after all. 

William learns some startling facts about Catherine after someone gives him a membership to an ancestry website.  These revelations could explain why his mother "had the blues" in his childhood.  Her depression resulted in Catherine maintaining a distance from William that deeply affected him.  It just goes to show that our parents are human.  They often have faults and issues we are unaware of.

Storytelling:

 This novel has a really creative approach to show how Lucy and William's divorce has impacted their daughter's lives.  As William looks into his family history, he asks Lucy to lend him her support.  This leads to a road trip where Lucy and William reflect on their marriage, and think about their own childhoods.  Everything that affects them is layered one on top of the other.  You can see a linear progression from both of their childhood issues to why their marriage ended in divorce.  Then this brings them to the present day, where they can both see how their actions have contributed to their daughter's insecurities.  I liked that they both did not assess blame on themselves for their daughter's issues.  It is what it is.  But they do acknowledge that they contributed to it. 

Trigger Warning for Childhood Abuse

Rating:   ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release Date:  October 19th, 2021

Author:  Elizabeth Strout

Publisher:  Random House

Genre:  Fiction

Page Length:  256 Pages

Source:  NetGalley

Format:  E-Book

Recommendation:  A worthy bookend for a haunting series that explores the effects of childhood trauma and poverty.  Read (or re-read) the previous books first, to get the full effect.

Please Note:  I received an advance copy of this novel from NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

It's been over two years since Effie's beloved parents got divorced, destroying the image of the happy, loving childhood she thought she had. Since then, she's become estranged from her father and embarked on a feud with his hot (and much younger) girlfriend, Krista. And now, more earth-shattering news: Greenoaks, the rambling Victorian country house Effie called home her whole life, has been sold.

When Krista decides to throw a grand "house cooling" party, Effie is originally left off the guest list--and then receives a last-minute "anti-invitation" (maybe it's because she called Krista a gold-digger, but Krista totally deserved it, and it was mostly a joke anyway). Effie declines, but then remembers a beloved childhood treasure is still hidden in the house. Her only chance to retrieve it is to break into Greenoaks while everyone is busy celebrating. As Effie sneaks around the house, hiding under tables and peeping through trapdoors, she realizes the secrets Greenoaks holds aren't just in the dusty passageways and hidden attics she grew up exploring. Watching how her sister, brother, and dad behave when they think no one is looking, Effie overhears conversations, makes discoveries, and begins to see her family in a new light. Then she runs into Joe--the love of her life, who long ago broke her heart, and who's still as handsome and funny as ever--and even more truths emerge.

But will Effie act on these revelations? Will she stay hidden or step out into the party and take her place with her family? And truthfully, what did she really come back to Greenoaks for? Over the course of one blowout party, Effie realizes that she must be honest with herself and confront her past before she'll ever be able to face her future. 

Review:

While I have not read Sophie Kinsella's most famous book series, The Shopaholic books, I have really enjoyed her novels over the past few years.  The Party Crasher continues this winning streak.  This novel is all about the changing nature of relationships. Effie's relationship with her parents has changed since their divorce.  And she is just starting to have a more equal relationship with her older siblings.  Effie is also adjusting to the reality that her childhood home, a place of mostly happy memories, is being sold.  

This book is about change and letting go.  But it is also about redefining our relationships as we get older.  As we mature, we may, or may not, be able to hold on to friendships and first loves.  And how we interact with our family members will change, whether due to distances apart, or the choices we make.

This is a book with some really funny moments, as the main character, Effie plans to crash her own parent's last party in her beloved childhood home.  The comedy may be a bit over the top, at times, but this is a really entertaining book.  If you love family comedies, you will want to run out and grab this novel.

What I Liked:

Topics of Divorce:

No, I don't "like" divorce.  But I was really glad to see this as one of the main themes of the book.  This is such a regular occurrence among older marriages.  A few years ago, I knew eight couples who's kids had recently graduated from high school.  All of them were getting a divorce.  While the reasons for this were many (long-term incompatibility, infidelity, etc.), they all thought they were doing the right thing by waiting for their kids to grow up.  But, sorry folks, divorce is still devastating on adult children.

Effie is the most affected by her parents divorce.  They seemed so happy to Effie.  But, being the youngest, her siblings sheltered her from seeing the friction between her dad and mom.  This really didn't do Effie any favors.  Now she is questioning whether or not her whole childhood, which had seemed so idyllic, was a lie. 

Characters:

Effie's brother and sister are fully formed characters, each with their own issues.  Gus, an absent-minded tech nerd,  is stuck in a relationship with a beautiful, but needy women.  Bean, Effie's sister, is the peacemaker.  She never gets ruffled.  So when Effie see Bean crying, and then getting angry at everyone, she knows something isn't right.   

I also loved the three siblings relationships with each other.  As Effie is the youngest, Gus and Bean are used to sheltering her from unpleasantness.  They won't usually tell her their problems.  And for a long time, Effie was happy with this.  As the book progresses, Effie sees that his dynamic must change in order for all of them to have more grown-up relationships with each other.  This lifts the load that Gus and Bean have been carrying, and lets Effie step up to the plate and be more responsible for how she relates to the family.

There's a lot of high comedy with the side characters.  Krista seems like a caricature of a gold-digging step-mom.  Joe, Effie's ex-boyfriend, seems snooty and unattainable.  And another former boyfriend, Hugh, is really full of himself.  But this is just a set up for revelations later in the book that make these characters much more human and relatable.

Family Relationships:

I think we all struggle as adults to adjust to relating to our parents as people.  They no longer have the automatic authority that they had when we were kids.  We start to see them as more complex, fallible people.  This is usually a good thing.  But it can be unsettling to realize that they weren't perfect.  Or if we have negative memories, we start to realize that our parent's choices were more difficult that we thought.  This is Effie's issue.  She has idealized her childhood as something magical and she can't let go of that myth.  Yes, she had some amazing experiences as a kid.  But her parents were just people, trying their best.  

Moving On:

I moved around quite a bit as a child.  So, as an adult, my husband and I made it a priority to stay put in one house for most of our kids lives.  As we get older and are starting to think about downsizing to a smaller house, our kids are not happy!  My youngest, especially, seems to want us to stay in this big house forever.  So I completely related to this book.   As Effie and her siblings say goodbye to their house and all the happy memories it holds, they have to find a way to move on.  Change is inevitable.  What Effie learns is that her family is still her family, no matter where they live.

Rating:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release Date:  October 12th, 2021

Author:  Sophie Kinsella

Publisher:  Dial Press

Genre:  Contemporary Fiction

Page Length:  368 Pages

Source:  NetGalley

Format:  E-Book

Recommendation:  Filled with wonderful characters and some over the top situations, this was a funny, and also touching book about letting go of the past.  I highly recommend this book.

Please Note:  I received an advance audio copy of this novel from Penguin Random House in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

’m crawling around on the bathroom floor, picking up pieces of myself. These pieces are not a metaphor. They are actual pieces.

Twenty years after the publication of her iconic Shutterbabe, we re-meet Deborah Copaken at her darkly comedic nadir: battered, broke, divorcing, dissected, and dying—literally—on sexism’s battlefield as she deliriously scoops up what she believes to be her internal organs, which have fallen out of her body, into a glass Tupperware container before heading off to the hospital for emergency surgery . . . in an UberPool.

Part cri de coeur cautionary tale, part dystopian tragicomedy, Ladyparts is Copaken’s irreverent inventory of both the female body and the body politic of womanhood in America. With her journalist’s eye, her novelist’s heart, and her performer’s sense of timing, she provides a frontline account of one woman brought to her knees by the one-two-twelve punch of divorce, solo motherhood, lack of healthcare, unaffordable childcare, shady landlords, her father’s death, college tuitions, sexual harassment, corporate indifference, ageism, sexism, and just plain old bad luck. Plus seven serious illnesses, one on top of the other, which provide the book’s narrative skeleton: vagina, uterus, breast, heart, cervix, brain, and lungs. She keeps bouncing back from each bum body part and finding the black humor in every setback, but in her slippery struggle to survive a steep plunge off the middle-class ladder, she is suddenly awoken to what it means to have no safety net.

Turning her Harlem home into a commune to pay rent and have childcare, she trades her life as a bestselling novelist to apply for full-time corporate gigs that come with health insurance but often not scruples. She gets fired from a health magazine for being unhealthy; laid off from a PR firm for rushing home to deal with a child’s medical emergency; and sexually harassed out of her newspaper column, only to be grilled by the FBI when her harasser is offered a plum job in the White House.

Side-splittingly funny one minute, a freak horror show the next, and quintessentially American, Ladyparts is an era-defining memoir for our time.

Review:

I find reviewing memoirs to be a bit difficult.  How do you review someone's life?  But I will say that author Deborah Copaken has filled this book with humor, and brutal honesty.  She also raises important issues about corporate culture, healthcare in America, and in particular, women's health issues.  At times the author uses shocking imagery to demonstrate just how disgusting it is to have reproductive organs.  But then she also shows the immense power that we have to create life.  I listened to the audiobook version of this book, narrated by the author, herself.

What I Liked:

Narration:

Who better to narrate this memoir than the person who wrote it!  Deborah Copaken does a terrific job of using her voice to evoke the raw emotions of some truly traumatic events.  She was the perfect choice to narrate this book.

Honest Portrayals:

The author spends the first part of the memoir discussing how her marriage collapsed, which I didn't particularly enjoy.  But it's a set up for the meat of the book, which is how it is to be a single parent scrounging for health insurance in New York City.  Her whole mission in life is about making sure she has health insurance.  This may seem extreme to those of us who have good health coverage.  But for many people, it is a very real struggle.  This means taking jobs where she is over-qualified, or severely under-paid in order to get that all important health benefit.  And often, Copaken must compromise her values, as when she worked for a pharmaceutical company, using her writing skills to push medicines.  

She is also honest about dating and sex as a single person.  She makes no apologies for needing the human contact that sexual encounters provide.  And she finds a way to do that without the entanglements of a committed relationship.  But she didn't start out with those expectations.  She shows the process, which is often filled with wrong turns and heartbreak.  

Women's Health Issues:

The author has had some truly horrible health issues to deal with.  She's starts out having a hysterectomy, and then many things go wrong.  I can't begin to spell all the procedures she has had to endure, but, if you read the book, she describes them in graphic detail.  As many woman know all too well, Copaken's symptoms were often dismissed by her doctors, and her concerns were not addressed.  At times, their neglect brought her to the brink of death.  

While this may seem unappealing to read about, I found learning about her health issues to be instructive.  It also goes to show you that people really need to advocate for themselves (and bring a back up person to assist).   Copaken often does everything right, but still has issues with the quality of her care.  A bit depressing to be sure, but I also admired her determination to get what she needed from her doctors.

Healthcare in America:

The heart of the book is about why it's such a bad idea to tie healthcare to employment.  As a freelance writer, Deborah Copaken has been quite successful and has made a reputation for herself as a strong advocate for women.  But as successful as she has been in her career, she has struggled over the years to find adequate health coverage.  When you have children who need checkups, shots, and so forth, and you also have significant health issues, this becomes the number one consideration in accepting a job.  What I find sad for Copaken is how much more could she had achieved if she didn't need to worry about healthcare coverage.  Think of what we are losing from our Creatives in American society because they are shackled by this burden.

What I was Mixed About:

As much as I liked this memoir, I do have a bone to pick with how she discussed her ex-husband.  Her ex-husband was diagnosed with high-functioning Autism (what we used to call Asperger's Syndrome).  And this colors all of her commentary about whey the marriage failed.  I didn't like that she blamed all of their problems on Autism.  She even had statistics to make the point that (apparently) most marriages between neuro-typical people and people with Autism end in divorce.  Perhaps that's true, but I also think each situation is unique.  She mostly focused on the fact that her emotional needs weren't being met by her husband.  But she never addresses if she was meeting his needs.  Obviously, these two weren't compatible over the long-term.  And she shows how she really made an effort to be understanding of his personality.  But it still troubled me that she blamed the end of their marriage on something her ex had no control over.

Rating:  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Release Date:  August 3rd, 2021

Author:  Deborah Copaken

Narrator:  Deborah Copaken

Print Publisher:  Random House

Page Length:  480 Pages

Audio Book Publisher:  Penguin Random House Audio

Audio Length:  16 hours, 37 minutes

Genre:  Memoir

Source:  Penguin Random House Audio

Format:  Audiobook

Recommendation:  I found this memoir to be very powerful, and I highly recommend it.