Please note :  I received an advance copy of this book from Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.  This did not influence the opinions in my review in any way.

Synopsis (from Goodreads):

Three Quinns. Three realities. Three Brumes.

The first Brume is a waking nightmare, overrun by literal monsters and cutthroat survivors. For Quinn, who is openly genderqueer, the only silver lining is their friendship with Lia—and the hope that there might still be a safe place somewhere else in the world.

The second Brume is a prison with no bars. Forced to “sort out” their sexuality with other teens at Camp Redemption, Quinn must also figure out why presenting as female has never felt quite right.

The third Brume is a warzone. For Quinn, who presents as male, leading the Resistance against an authoritarian government is hard, since even the Resistance might not accept them if they knew Quinn’s truth.

As Quinn starts to realize that they might be one person alternating among these three worlds and identities, they wonder: Which world is the real one? Or do they all contain some deeper truth?

You can't run from the monster. The monster is you. 

Review:

I have been a fan of this author ever since I read their book, The Cemetery Boys.  I also have followed them on social media, so I am well aware of the personal struggles they've had.  This book is not about the author.  But with it's deep exploration of the main character's gender and sexuality, one can't help but feel this must be a very special project.  It is also a very entertaining book.  With a wildly original premise, this novel had me hooked from the beginning, racing through to find out what will happen at the end.

What I Liked:

Premise:

There are three very different realities with different versions of the same group of characters, In one version, Quinn is a young man who is living in a war zone.  He is the leader of the Resistance.  Quinn may be a leader, but he is sick of war.  He is also at war with himself, trying to decide if he was male or something else.  Another Quinn is female who has been sent to Camp Redemption to "pray the gay" away.  This place is just as awful as one would imagine.  Everything seems just like a place for confused youth.  But underneath there's shaming, beatings, and aversion shock therapy.  In a third version, Quinn is genderfluid.  But they are barely surviving monsters, roving gangs, and a strange fog that encompasses the whole of the town.

Each world is a nightmare.  

Characters:

Quinn, all three of them, is a character who takes care of people.  They are caring, and sees the best in others.  Which is why it is such a blow when someone betrays them.  They really want what anyone wants:  a supportive family, a loving relationships, and friends.  They also don't want to hide who they are.  I really ached for Quinn and their struggles.

Laia is Quinn's love interest in each of the world.  But each world has a very different version of her.  In the war world, and the world with the conversion camp, Laia is Quinn's girlfriend.  In the world of monsters, Laia is Quinn's unrequited love.  In each scenario, Laia is complicated.  She often has her own aganda, and Quinn is not the center of her universe.  But doesn't Quinn deserve more?

Lloyd is completely different in each world.  In the war world, he is Quinn's fiercely loyal friend.  But he wants nothing to do with "f*gs" (sorry, but I do not use that word).  Would Lloyd be so loyal if he knew Quinn was questioning their identity?  At Camp Redemption, Lloyd is definitely a gay man.  He is also strong-minded and will not allow himself to be brainwashed into changing his mind.  In the world of monsters, Lloyd is the brutal leader of a gang who wants Quinn to join.  Each reality has Lloyd as a strong personality, who seems drawn to Quinn. 

Theme:

The theme of this book is about finding your identity and embracing it.  It's about facing your fears of rejection from family, friends, and society.  It's about being brave.  I know several teens and adults who are LGBTQ+.  It takes courage to face a hostile world.  People don't' like what they don't understand.  If you want acceptance, the best place to start is with yourself.  For many who don't have supportive people in their lives, it takes work to love and accept yourself in all your complexity.  This theme made this a very special book.

What I Didn't Like:

War Reality:

I had one small quibble with the book...

While I could accept the reality where there is a raging war with religious fanatics oppressing a resistance, I found the idea that Quinn was the leader of the resistance to be rediculous.  This person is seventeen years old and is running a military operation?  And the leader of the Alliance (the bad guys) is another teenager?  And these people have actual adults following their orders?  I couldn't see any reason for this.  The story would have been more realistic, and just as powerful, if the characters were regular soldiers.  

Trigger Warnings for conversion therapy, and other violence against LGBTQ+ people.

Rating: 

Release Date:  October 6th, 2020

Author:  Z Brewer

Publisher:  Quill Tree Books

Genre:  YA Fantasy

Page Length:  432 Pages

Source:  Edelweiss

Format:  E-Book

Recommendation:  This fantasy is like no other.  With important themes, this is a very special book.